the light of doom
Posted: January 23, 2012 Filed under: Haiku | Tags: anxiety, daily haiku, munday Leave a commentthe light of doom shines
reflection in my brown eyes
my soul it confines.
writing
Posted: January 19, 2012 Filed under: daily musings | Tags: anxiety, complete honesty, no expectations Leave a commentwhen i write i bring the truth of my situation out. it is a great therapy for me. however, i still need help and support outside of myself. i am blessed to have a supportive wife and family, plus many, many friends on my side. as i write i already feel bad about questioning my situation, but sometimes failure is unavoidable. my work is not doing what it is supposed to right now. whether it’s out of my control or not, something needs to break.
all i can do is work hard and smart. that is a tough pill to swallow, but it’s time to put my money where my mouth is; put out love and expect nothing in return.
wonder
Posted: January 18, 2012 Filed under: daily musings | Tags: anxiety, complete honesty, curiosity Leave a commentI have been spending a lot of energy thinking about all of my effort recently. I do not care about being rich, but I want to be finacially stable; not living paycheck to paycheck. I’ve put a lot of time into things I love, which is very rewarding… but am I spinning my tires instead of moving towards a stress free economy for my family? Happiness is a priority for me this year. As is love. We will get by, but not struggling and stressing every month (or week) would be great. Can I make what I love into a career? Only time will tell, but I am wracked with anxiety and thoughts of jumping ship to get on a more worn path. I need a sign God.
how do i know?
Posted: January 18, 2012 Filed under: Haiku | Tags: anxiety, daily haiku Leave a commentwill i ever know
that i am walking along
the path meant for me?
2012 goals
Posted: December 29, 2011 Filed under: daily musings | Tags: 1, anxiety, complete honesty, goals vs priorities Leave a commentsince 2007, i have written yearly goals for myself. they have helped me focus on what is truly important, and each year has been better than the last. now as i head into 2012 with an uncertain working future, i am in need of priorities more than ever. but i’ve been reading more and more of those who in the past set goals and have since moved on from it. they say it is like a burden gone from them, it allows what they truly want to do to flow from them and they put themselves into what they love without the pressure of achieving. i have considered a priorities list vs actual goals, to remind myself what is really important to me without a specific destination set in writing. my goals have been evolving this way anyway, but it is still a scary step. any thoughts on this? i feel like at least giving it a try; i can always set down goals. that is probably what i will do, but the lack of a clear end result triggers my ‘trip anxiety’. i want to live in this moment. now this one, now this one…
can i make it happen?
Posted: December 26, 2011 Filed under: Haiku | Tags: anxiety, daily haiku, perseverance Leave a commentthe grief and worry
consumes my brain and being.
a few breaths, all clear.
dark
Posted: December 23, 2011 Filed under: Haiku | Tags: anxiety, daily haiku, perseverance Leave a commenthere i am again.
the darkening horizon
approaching quickly.
overwhelming
Posted: December 13, 2011 Filed under: Haiku | Tags: 1, anxiety, daily haiku Leave a commentoverwhelming me
are the choices i have made.
focus on just one.
choice
Posted: November 25, 2011 Filed under: Haiku | Tags: anxiety, daily haiku Leave a commentwhat choice do i have?
anxiety will not stop,
whether yes or no.
fear
Posted: November 25, 2011 Filed under: daily musings | Tags: anxiety Leave a commenttoday i fear something that should be fun. if i’m scared, i don’t have to do it. but why the fear? i’ve done it before. anxiety rules me, and only seems to get worse. should i dive in? or should i just avoid it?
richard awesome 